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Caffeine is a Helluva Drug
Holy cow! Where did the time go? I’ve been keeping my head down working on another writing project, but, seeing as I tossed this suggestion out to Richard a while back, I figured I’d better take part. Sooo…
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Way Too Literal
It’s been a crazy week. Moving. Laptop died. No cable. Excuse, excuse excuse. Tack on that I know nothing about basketball or this supposed March Madness of which everyone is speaking. So I give you…
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The Night Watchmen
I always loved these guys. Just wondering what they’d be up to now. [fountain] INT. HIGH RISE BUILDING – NIGHT Frankie and Willie, two very New York sounding night watchmen, patrol the hallways of an office building in Manhattan. They check doors as they walk and talk.
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The Adventures of Professor Grebitus
[fountain] INT. INVENTOR’S LAB – DAY PROFESSOR GREBITUS and his assistant, MERL, stand among the various whirling contraptions and bubbling beakers. Professor Grebitus holds in his hands a small, golden device that looks a lot like a pocket watch. PROFESSOR GREBITUS Behold, Merl, my greatest invention! I hold in my hand, the power to control…
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Make ‘Em Pay!
INT. GAME SHOW STUDIO Our host, BERT, is standing next to contestant, VANESSA. Beside them is a large wheel with words like “Bludgeon”, “Knee-Cap”, “Papercuts & Lemon Juice” and “Light ‘Em Up!” printed on it. BERT Welcome back to Make ‘Em Pay, the game show where Average Joe’s get to take out their frustrations on…
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An Old Fashioned
Perhaps I took this one a bit too literally. Lights up on a traditional, proscenium stage. The velvet, red curtains part to reveal a door. Reginald Jeeves (a proper British butler) arrives at the door at the same moment as Lt. Commander Data (a very formal android). Jeeves tips his hat and extends his hand…
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Pimp My TV (Michael’s Entry)
FADE IN: We see the familiar green title card that precedes all trailers: “The following preview has been approved…” As it fades to black slow, mournful, piano music plays as the following words appear on the screen: FROM THE DERANGED MIND OF WES CRAVEN, THE MAN WHO BROUGHT YOU A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET AND…
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FSW: Advertising Edition (Michael’s Entry)
FADE IN: INT. BANK TELLER LINE – DAY MARK, well dressed and handsome, is standing in line waiting to cash a check. He notices GARY, dressed in drab, ill-fitting clothes, holding a sack of change. Gary looks at his watch. MARK That’s a nice watch. GARY Oh, thanks. My mom got it for me. MARK…
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FSW: Borders Edition (Michael’s Entry)
EXT. PARKING LOT – DAY A large, olive green tent is set up in a desolated parking lot. The remnants of burned out cars sit around it. The urban landscape is near ruin. There is a Red Cross painted on top of the tent. A long line of disheveled, sickly looking refugee-types are waiting their…