Here’s Andrew Pish’s take on the “Star Trek” edition of Sketchwar.
EXT. REDWOOD FOREST – NIGHT
We see CAPTAIN JEAN-LUC PICARD standing still, looking down at a stone dais. The camera slowly pans around Picard and then, facing Picard, we see a hooded figure move menacingly quiet and close. He stops. The hooded figure then speaks.
Are you ready, my brother?
The MAN takes off his hood, revealing an attractive young male who resembles Jean-Luc.
(pause, then shaking it off)
This time, I will finally get to see some of the action. Jean-Luc won’t be the only Picard that’s called a hero.
We need to be careful, Peter. You can’t be reckless.
And I won’t be reckless, I just know that I can’t be beat. I’ve been practicing with my phaser for years, and finally I’ll be able to use it for good. My teacher at the Academy says that I’m the best shot he’s ever seen.
Being the best shot and staying alive are two very different things, Peter.
Well I won’t let the Klingon hurt my family. And there’s no chance that I’m going to die. I want a wife, and this is the best chance I’ve got of improving my resume.
We begin to hear footsteps in the distance. Peter and Jean-Luc quickly move to take cover behind two trees. They lie in wait. The camera cuts to five Klingon warriors moving slowly forward, phasers drawn, set to kill. The camera cuts back to Peter and Jean-Luc.
Peter motions to move to a different position.
Jean-Luc slowly, sternly, moves head back and forth: “no”.
Peter dashes across to another tree. A KLINGON sees him and shoots him in the hand.
Peter tumbles on the ground, collapses in the open.
Jean-Luc doesn’t miss a beat, moves from behind the tree, phaser drawn.
(unsure, to himself)
Not this time.
Stay away from my brother!
Jean-Luc charges at the Klingon, shoots his phaser, and hits two Klingon in the chest, killing both. The others then retreat behind adjacent trees. Jean-Luc then runs to Peter to help him up.
(smiling, in pain)
Didn’t need that hand anyway.
Let’s move back to the house, we can treat your wound and...
(cutting him off)
Nuh-uh. No way. Lose the opportunity to finally have a heroic war story? Not a chance. I’ve got a plan.
Peter runs off from Jean-Luc, and quickly climbs up a tree to a rope hanging off a branch.
(quietly, to Jean-Luc)
They’ll never expect it. Imagine that: Peter, a 24th century Tarzan.
A KLINGON moves from behind a tree and shoots Peter in the chest.
Peter falls off the branch to the ground.
Jean-Luc rushes to Peter, pulls him into his arms, tries to take his pulse.
Not this time, Peter! Remember? You still need a wife! Peter. Come on, Peter!
Peter is unresponsive. Jean-Luc pulls him close, rocking back and forth, tears streaming. The Klingons move from their cover and fire at Jean-Luc. The phaser beams do nothing to Jean-Luc. Everything slowly fades away around Jean-Luc, revealing the holodeck.
No. Nooo. I’m not finished! I didn’t say that I was finished. You can’t stop this. Computer, reload the program!
COMPUTER. RELOAD THE PROGRAM.
Commander William T. RIKER moves into the room.
The definition of insanity, doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
This is not a healthy habit.
He was my brother. He wanted a chance to prove himself. And now I’m haunted by my decision to let him.
You couldn’t have known.
I should have known, but I was reckless. This program reminds me that I have my family’s blood on my hands. And as long as I can see it. Smell it. Feel it. I won’t ever be that reckless again.
Riker solemnly looks at Jean-Luc, turns around and leaves the holodeck.
Peter. Next time, Peter.
Jean-Luc slowly gets up and walks out.
FADE TO BLACK.