{"id":204,"date":"2009-02-03T17:48:00","date_gmt":"2009-02-04T01:48:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wwwold.sketchwar.org\/?p=204"},"modified":"2009-02-03T17:48:00","modified_gmt":"2009-02-04T01:48:00","slug":"ras-self-critique-advertising-edition","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sketchwar.org\/?p=204","title":{"rendered":"R.A.’s self-critique: Advertising Edition"},"content":{"rendered":"

My advertising sketch<\/a> is yet another example of an interesting premise in need of editing. I seem to be producing a lot of these lately. It’s a simple blackout, but I dragged it out by inserting the second scene in 1992. I think it’s necessary for internal narrative cohesiveness, but lessens the overall impact. Way too much time passes from setup to finish.<\/p>\n

Then I made matters worse because I didn’t trust the blackout.<\/p>\n

The second scene could probably have been a two- or three-liner, but I wanted to include the little “soften the ground” joke. It’s not a big laugh, good at best for a chuckle in retrospect after the final joke falls, and clearly unnecessary.<\/p>\n

Worse is the first scene. As I was writing the sketch I tried dealing with the tension between getting to the end fast and actually making the sketch *funny*. One joke sketches scare me. If the joke’s not funny enough, they’re complete failures. So I stuffed in the Don\/Darren\/Rock jokes, of which I hope everyone got at least two (and a gold star to anyone who got all three,) hoping to ensure at least a couple of chuckles. But of course that delays the time to blackout more, so it’s probably a net humor loss. Also, they should have hit quicker with a ba-ba-boom, boom, boom pattern. Oh yeah, and I *hated* the whole “crow kept tapping” crap but couldn’t think of a better way of implying Darren had been transformed. Ugh.<\/p>\n

And of course, the biggest worry is that the big joke didn’t actually land. Y’all got that Gareth’s dad wanted to “sell ice to an Eskimo”, right?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My advertising sketch is yet another example of an interesting premise in need of editing. I seem to be producing a lot of these lately. It’s a simple blackout, but I dragged it out by inserting the second scene in 1992. I think it’s necessary for internal narrative cohesiveness, but lessens the overall impact. Way […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[12,262],"class_list":["post-204","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-analysis","tag-advertising","tag-analysis"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/204","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=204"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/204\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=204"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=204"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=204"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}