Category: Sketches

  • FSW: Small Store Edition

    Richard is the early bird this week with a hilarious sketch about a little pillow talk.I know Dave was headed to a Cubs game today, so he could be busy putting on his parka and snow boots before heading to the stadium. It’s like March here today.Here’s my sketch for what it’s worth. After seeing…

  • FSW: Pillow Talk

    Pillow Talk(Mark and Vanessa lie side by side in bed with the sheets pulled up to strategically cover their nudity. Hair is mussed. They’ve clearly just finished an energetic session of lovemaking.) MARKThat your thong? VANESSAWhere? MARKCeiling fan. VANESSAUm, no I think that one’s yours. That was…where did you learn that new trick? MARKThe one…

  • Shadows on the Cave Wall

    (RICK and STEVE in the front of a car. RICK is driving. STEVE is in the passenger’s seat.) (RICK suddenly swerves, then honks his horn.) RICKLook at this jackass. STEVEWhat a moron. RICK (yelling out window)Jackass!(pause)Sometimes I think everyone except me is an idiot. (pause) STEVEAm I an idiot? RICKWell, let’s approach this Socratically. Are…

  • FSW: Meta-Bistro Edition

    I’m gonna second what Richard said about his post this week. Not quite firing on all cylinders. I’m really looking forward to the weekend. And not doing a damn thing if I can help it.No word from Dave yet, but he could be busy putting razor-wire around his apartment. (A small table in a stylish…

  • FSW: Blind Date

    Please forgive me ahead of time for a boring sketch. I’ve had a rough week and didn’t get to this until an hour ago. It’s not good. Seriously. Sorry. Blind Date(Meredith sits at a small table in a stylish bistro with a glass of wine. She is fashionably dressed. She frequently raises her eyes from…

  • Las Vegas Itasca

    (An architectural planning meeting in Vegas. WENTWORTH, BRAD, and GEORGE stand around a table. On the wall is a placard: Wentworth Casinos, Las Vegas, NV. Out the window is a view of the Strip.) WENTWORTHWho’s next? BRADWe’ve got Kirk Luberda. Bright young architecture student from the Midwest. GEORGE (skeptically)Ah. What do you think he’ll try…

  • FSW: Silence is Golden Edition

    Happy Friday to us, every one!Here’s the news that’s fit to print. Richard is dressed as Rachel Ray. Dave is building the casino of his dreams in Vegas. There’s no word, yet, from Red.So I’ve been trying to work on brevity. My last couple of sketches have felt a little long. I’ve also been experimenting…

  • FSW: Rachel Ray, $40 a Day

    For the whiny little bitches – you know who you are – who are going to read this and say “you’ve never been with a real woman…you wouldn’t know what to do…curves…hawt…” whatever. Rachel Ray’s genetics are showing through. She’s going to be a fat old Italian woman someday. Facts are facts. So what? I’m…

  • FSW: Great Outdoors Edition

    Another week come and gone. I would have had this up sooner, but I’ve been hiding under my desk in case another aftershock rolls through here. Earthquakes are only supposed to happen in Third World Countries and California. Not the Midwest.Anyhow, Richard came out, guns a-blazing, with a funny party planning idea.No word from Dave…

  • FSW: Party Planners

    Allow me to preface this sketch with a preemptive “meh”. High concept, but it really goes nowhere. Not without a multi-million dollar budget to make it all happen, at least. Hmm… Party Planners(A large number of people fill a cavernous hall, dressed formally. The lights go down, and crossing, moving spots cut through the darkness.…