Just as last week’s topic was a bit of foreign territory for some of the warriors, this week’s topic is a mystery to me. The sum of my knowledge of the CSI family of shows comes from the “Endless Caruso One Liners” video. However, far be it from me to fake what I don’t know.
With this topic, I figured the key was location, location, location. Hope you enjoy.
EXT. ESTABLISHING URBAN BROWNSTONE – DAY
A prewar neighborhood in slight disrepair, but holding it together. Police cars on the street. Sidewalks barricaded.
INT. APARTMENT – DAY
Books, furniture, and bits of white fluff strewn everywhere. Two plainclothes detectives stand, backs to us, blocking the body. GROVER, a blue and smallish monster, turns and tilts his head. His commanding officer, SAM THE EAGLE, a very large eagle, turns to face him.
SAM
What do you think?
The camera moves around to display the body. A tall, skinny, yellow fellow with a single tuft of black hair and unibrow to match lies severed at the waist, stuffing spilling out.
GROVER
Well Sam, looks like someone
(beat)
is a real cut-up.
Grover puts on sunglasses as we...
CUT TO:
The theme song, The Who’s “Fiddle About” starts playing as the opening credits run with intercut shots of the city and its denizens.
TITLE – CSI: SESAME STREET
INT. LAB – DAY
Grover enters and takes off his sunglasses. He crosses to a bench where COOKIE MONSTER sits at a widescreen monitor
GROVER
What do you have for me, Cookie?
Cookie Monster pops a piece of gum in his mouth. Grover tilts his head in question.
COOKIE
Me trying to quit smoking.
(beat)
Me find this security tape from building across way.
Close on screen. Grainy black and white footage of the front step.
GROVER
Can you enhance that?
Cookie taps the keyboard. The image on the screen becomes sharper, clearer, and full-color. The words on a scrap of newspaper floating down the street are even legible. A meter reader walks through the frame.
COOKIE
That best me can do.
GROVER
(loud sigh)
I guess we’ll look for other evidence.
EXT. STREET – DAY
JANICE and Grover stand at a PRETZEL CART.
GROVER
Please tell me you have some good news.
JANICE
Like, the boyfriend’s felt is all over the crime scene, you know?
GROVER
That’s not very strange at all.
JANICE
But that’s like, really incriminating.
GROVER
(exasperated)
Not if he lives there.
INT. APARTMENT – NIGHT
Grover and Sam the Eagle scout for more evidence.
GROVER
We must have overlooked something.
Sam spins and glowers at Grover.
SAM
Are you questioning my eyesight?
Grover bends down and reaches under a couch.
GROVER
It’s not about eyesight...
Grover stands up with a book in hand and puts on his sunglasses.
GROVER (CONT’D)
...it’s about insight.
INT. LAB – NIGHT
Cookie stares in his microscope. Sam and Grover hover close by. Cookie sucks on a lollipop. Sam tilts his head in question.
COOKIE
Me trying to quit booze.
Cookie picks up four books. One is the book Grover found at the crime scene.
COOKIE (CONT’D)
One of these things not like others.
Cookie eats the other three books.
EXT. ALLEY – DAY
Sam and Grover stand over a corpse wearing the uniform of a meter reader. Grover rolls him over to reveal EASY READER.
SAM
It doesn’t make any sense. He didn’t even live here.
GROVER
Sometimes crime doesn’t add up.
BLACKOUT: