INT. GAME SHOW STUDIO

Our host, BERT, is standing next to contestant, VANESSA. Beside them is a large wheel with words like “Bludgeon”, “Knee-Cap”, “Papercuts & Lemon Juice” and “Light ‘Em Up!” printed on it.

BERT
Welcome back to Make ‘Em Pay, the game show where Average Joe’s get to take out their frustrations on John Q. WallStreet and Congressman Do-Nothing. I’m here with today’s grand prize winner Vanessa. Vanessa, are you feeling better yet?

VANESSA
When do I win money?

BERT
Now, Vanessa, remember that not all the prizes have cash attached to them. Some of them have something even better: Revenge!

The audience cheers! The curtain is opened to reveal a corral of men in business suits. They are all a little worse for wear. A few try to climb out of the pen, but are met with large men wielding electric cattle prods.

BERT
Mr. Voice, who do we have for Vanessa today?

Mr. Voice’s voice comes through the speakers.

MR. VOICE
Well, Bert, today Vanessa has a chance to thank former Bear Sterns CEO Jimmy Cayne. Jimmy sold off company stock, once valued at over $1 billion dollars, months before Bear Sterns went belly up and walked away with a cool $62 million golden parachute.

BERT
Have you ever even seen $62 million dollars, Vanessa?

VANESSA
I’d suck your [BLEEP], with him watching, for fifty bucks.

BERT
Whoa! Okay, Vanessa. Why don’t you spin our Karma Wheel and see how we’re going to –

The audience chants it with him.

BERT
Make. ‘Em. Pay!

The audience cheers! Vanessa spins the wheel.

BERT
What’s it going to be? Is he going to get off easy with Indian burns or are we going to see a Columbian neck-tie today?

Jimmy is standing off to the side, rocking back and forth repeating “Indian burns. Indian burns.”

The wheel slows. Everyone gets really excited as “Branded” rolls past, followed by “Atomic Wedgie”. They erupt into wild applause as the spinner stops. Lights flash and alarms sound!

BERT
It’s Glutton for Greenbacks, Vanesssa!

Jimmy struggles as the large men strap him down to a table and a beautiful model brings out a wheelbarrow full of cash. Vanessa begins jumping up and down.

VANESSA
Is all that for me?

BERT
That depends on how hungry Jimmy here is.

VANESSA
What do you mean?

BERT
Vanessa, you’re going to start stuffing that money down Jimmy’s throat and whatever goes down is yours to keep.

Vanessa doesn’t wait for Bert to finish, she sprints over to the table, squats over Jimmy’s chest and starts cramming fistfuls of cash into his mouth.

BERT
Get as much in there as you can, because whatever doesn’t go in doesn’t go home with you.

Jimmy is squirming. Vanessa is like a woman possessed. Fistful after fistful pounded into his mouth. Bert turns to the camera.

BERT
Well folks, that’s our show for today. Remember, if you’d like to get in on the fun, all you have to do is show up at our studios between 8am and 3pm. We tape seven shows a day. And we have plenty of bankers and politicians yet to go. Have a great day. And remember, even if you don’t have two pennies to rub together you can still Make. ‘Em. Pay!

He blows a kiss to the camera. The audience cheers. Vanessa keeps stuffing money into a now motionless Jimmy Cayne.

FADE OUT