Another fun one from E.L. Raica. I think it’s about time to get that lady her own account! This one had me laughing from the word go. Well, technically it had me laughing from the word “Kyle”. You’ll see what I mean. Enjoy, and be sure to let E.L. know what you think.
INT. BUBBLE – TWILIGHT
A giant bubble hangs in the middle of dark, empty space somewhere within the vastness of the universe. KYLE REESE, TERMINATOR 1 (CIRCA 1984), TERMINATOR 2 (CIRCA 1991), MARTY MCFLY, MORLOCK AND ELOI sit broken and disheveled waist high in piles of socks. DOC BROWN lays huddled in the corner in the fetal position.
REESE
Okay. So we’ve been stuck here for two days now in this...
(points to Doc)
what did he call it?
MCFLY
Time vortex.
REESE
We have no food, no water, and me and the twins here are naked and freezing
(points to the Terminators who are shivering)
to boot, the only guy who can get us out of here is losing his mind.
DOC
1.21 gigawatts!
REESE
To make matters worse, we have socks dumping on us every few hours, and it seems like we keep getting new time travelers zapping in here every time we turn around. I’ve suggested that we try to blast our way out. But Doc...
DOC
Flux capacitor!
REESE
Seems to think that that will cause a rift in the space-time continuum subsequently creating a time paradox and destroying the universe as we know it. I’m all out of ideas. Are there any suggestions?
Morlock raises his hand.
REESE
No Morlock. I told you. Eating McFly is out of the question. Any other suggestions?
ELOI
I propose we just give up. What’s the point? I’m tired. I’m weak. And all this toil is putting a strain on my nerves. Let’s face it, we’re done for.
MORLOCK
Forget McFly. Let’s eat the Eloi. He’s useless. And his lazy eye makes me jittery.
REESE
Nobody’s eating anybody. . . yet. What about you two? Terminators? Any suggestions?
TERMINATOR 1
Kill Sarah Connor.
TERMINATOR 2
Save Sarah Connor.
TERMINATOR 1
Kill her.
TERMINATOR 2
Save her.
Terminators get into a scuffle.
REESE
Knock it off! What did I tell you before?
TERMINATOR 1 & 2
Keep your eyes ahead and your hands to yourself.
TERMINATOR 1
But he started it.
TERMINATOR 2
Did not!
Suddenly a beeping is heard and a woman’s VOICE comes over an intercom system.
VOICE (O.S.)
Warning. Commence dumping in five seconds.
MCFLY
Here we go again.
VOICE (O.S.)
Five, four, three, two, one.
A trap door opens from above and hundreds of unmatched socks dump onto the group.
REESE
Enough with the socks already!
MCFLY
Hey, it could be worse. Could be car keys, right, doc?
DOC
Mr. Fusion!
ELOI
Well, I wish it would stop. I’m starting to chafe and my delicate pores are getting linty.
MORLOCK
(looking hungrily at Eloi and then back to group)
I’m just saying, we can start small. A toe perhaps? Maybe a finger? Come on, man, I’m starving!
Suddenly a loud buzzing is heard. The whole bubble starts to vibrate.
MCFLY
Perfect! Just what we need. Others.
In a flash of light, a FETUS trapped inside of a placenta, much like the one from “2001: A Space Odyssey,” zaps into the middle of the bubble. It floats in the center of the bubble while the group looks at it in awe. Eloi, Reese, and McFly start walking toward the fetus.
ELOI
A baby?
REESE
A fetus.
MCFLY
It’s adorable.
DOC
Great Scott!
Suddenly the Fetus turns into a flaming fireball and starts darting around, bouncing off the sides of the bubble. Everybody ducks. The flaming fetus clocks Reese in the face knocking him to the ground. As it approaches McFly, it slows and comes to a stop. McFly looks back at the flaming fetus in wonderment.
REESE
What are you waiting for, McFly? Take it down!
MCFLY
I don’t think it means us any harm. I think it’s trying to send us a message.
Suddenly the flames die out and the Fetus falls to the floor.
MCFLY
I guess not.
Morlock walks over and looks down at the Fetus.
MORLOCK
Can I?
MCFLY
Be my guest.
Morlock grabs the Fetus and runs to the corner.
REESE
So, I will ask again. Does anybody have any ideas about getting us out of here? The situation is obviously getting dire. Who knows what kind of creature is going to beam in here next?
As they sit pondering a solution, a low WHOOSH is heard.
ELOI
(terrified)
What was that?
The Whoosh is heard again, only louder.
MORLOCK
(to Eloi)
It’s nothing! Stop being so jumpy.
The Whoosh is heard again, but, this time, the bubble starts to rumble and vibrate. Suddenly, the Terminators disappear followed by Eloi, Morlock, and McFly. Reese runs over to Doc who is still lying huddled in the fetal position.
REESE
(panicked; shaking Doc)
Doc? What’s going on? What is it?
DOC
(suddenly coherent; pauses and looks around)
The byproduct of human apathy and despair.
REESE
What?!
Reese disappears.
DOC
Oh, the facticity.
Doc disappears.