Sketch War

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  • Hippy in the 25th Century

    This isn’t much and really pales in comparison to the link I posted earlier today. I was firing on all cylinders in that sketch whereas this one…

    This has one little visual joke and is a vaguely cute-ish idea. That’s it. Oh well. Better luck *next* time.

    [fountain]
    INT. APOLLO SPACE CAPSULE – NIGHT
    The camera pans over the capsule, showing the hundreds of switches, gauges, and lights of the craft. Crammed in a back corner we see BILL ROGERS, early 20s and dressed like a NASA technician but with the top of a tie dyed shirt showing under his jumper, holding a bong with “RANGER 3” painted on its bowl in neon strokes. Rogers exhales a cloud of smoke. The capsule begins to shake and a roar is heard.
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  • RA’s Hippie Apology

    Uh, I’ve been spinning my wheels all week and not very productive outside work. At work? Gang busters. Out in the world, where I actually give a shit about stuff? Not so much.

    I still hope to write a sketch for this week but in the meantime how about taking a trip in the wayback machine to March of 2008 when I last tackled hippies. (It took three showers to wash their funk off after tackling them, too.)

    So until later (or not,) I give you…Fight the Patriarchy.

  • Hippie Diplomacy

    Late again this week. Bummer. Here’s to the hippies! May they save us from nuclear annihilation.

    [fountain]

    INT. OFFICE OF KIM JONG IL – NORTH KOREA – DAY

    Psychedelic SITAR MUSIC plays in the background as RAIN RIVER SUNSHINE-GRASS, a hippie dressed in traditional hippie garb (tie dye shirt, beads, fringe vest, Birkenstocks, long hair and beard, etc.) sits with KIM JONG IL and his INTERPRETER on the couch.

    Surrounding them are about twenty PEOPLE engaged in bacchanalia. Some are getting down with orgies, others are circle-toking or dropping acid, while others are dancing with themselves lost in a euphoric state.
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  • The D.U.D.E. 9000

    Here’s my take on the “Hippies” edition of Sketchwar.

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  • Pirates Wrapup

    I’ve been lax the last few weeks in wrapping up the battles. But this week I was Shanghaied and conscripted to service aboard the ‘Bountiful Booty’. It’s write this wrapup or scrape the barnacles off Captain Jack’s peg leg.

    If you thought pirates were interesting, wait until you see what the sketch warriors do with their kissing cousins: hippies.

    If you think you’ve got the comedy chops to do battle with our scarred and bitter warriors, if you dare step into the hailstorm of seltzer and cream pies, if you think you’re MAN ENOUGH or WOMAN ENOUGH to make us laugh, write a sketch and contact us at submissions(nospam)@sketchwar.org.

  • The Great Ship in the Sky

    Avast ye! — here’s my take on the “Pirates” edition of Sketchwar.

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  • Pirates of the Strip

    Arrgh! Almost didn’t make it this week. But then I realized, like R.A., I haven’t missed a week since I started. Tryin’ to keep the streak alive.

    Got this idea walking down the Vegas strip this weekend. It’s completely stupid and random. But I figured, why not?

    [fountain]

    EXT. LAS VEGAS STRIP – LATE EVENING

    Over a dozen PIRATES, dressed in traditional pirate attire (puffy shirts, pirate hats, buckle shoes, eye patches, etc), stand on the curb handing out cards plastered with naked women to passers by. Over their attire, they wear orange vests emblazoned with “Wenches Direct, 1-800-YE-BOOTY.”
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  • Q: What’s a Pirate’s favorite baseball statistic?

    A: Arrrr! Bee Eyes!

    Stubborn and obstinate, that’s what I am. Do you know how many weeks I’ve skipped since the very first Sketch War? Zero.

    Suck it, life!
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  • Sell Me Lies, Sell Me Sweet Little Lies

    So, my extensive apartment hunting has lead me to the realization that anytime you see “cozy,” “clean,” or  “cheap,” run away… run far away. And don’t ever trust Mr. Hsu. At some point, I was actually expecting him break out with,  “With a capital T, that rhymes with P and that stands for Pool.”  A fine rainmaking, snake-oil salesman. This one’s for you Mr. Hsu.

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  • Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire!

    I took this week’s cue a bit too literally, I think.
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